Wisdom teeth - essay

I have no idea why we have wisdom teeth. Nor do I understand why they are called "wisdom" teeth. As they erupt between seventeen and twenty-one years of age there can't be much wisdom involved. In any case, we all have them. Unless, of course, the dentist gets them. Dentists, I have learned from much experience, can't stand wisdom teeth. Or at least they can't stand the fact that someone over twenty or thirty-something still has them. I have had mine for almost sixty years. That is, two of them. The dentist got two of them before I was savvy enough to know I could keep them if I wished. I have been to many dentists during these many years. To a man they have all coveted my remaining wisdom teeth. I should say to a man and woman, as I mistakenly went to two different female dentists under the delusion they would perhaps be more gentle than males. But this is a different story. The fact is, every dentist upon seeing these two remaining third molars has insisted they be removed. Having memories of the trauma involved in losing the first two I have actively resisted, usually by seeking out a new dentist. "They never bother me," I insist. "Why should you take them out?"
"They serve no useful purpose," they argue. "They are hard to clean," they observe. "They might get infected," they hypothesize. "They're crowding the rest of your teeth," they remonstrate. "There is no opposing tooth for them to grind on," they explain. "They're going to need filling so you might as well have them removed." And so on.
Throughout all of this I have remained steadfast. Like a rock, as the song says. "They don't bother me. When they start to bother me I'll have them out" (I'm not sure I really mean this). I have gone through about fifty years of this. The teeth still don't bother me. But they continue to drive dentists absolutely bonkers. Some of them can barely contain their anger in the face of such utter (in their view) stubborn stupidity. I no longer care what they think. By the time the two lonely partnerless and neglected molars start to bother me I'll be so old it won't matter. Perhaps I won't be here at all. But for better or worse I'll still have my two sturdy back teeth and my pride.
I hesitate to say it, but I suspect it may be true. They don't want my wisdom teeth at all. What they really want is a new putter. Or a paint job for their Porsche. Or a birthday present for their wife. Or some such. It makes you wonder what they learn in dental school. Do they really believe they should take out a perfectly healthy tooth because it might get infected? It should be removed because of its remote location? Because it perhaps will develop a cavity and have to be filled (just try to get a dentist to fill a wisdom tooth)? Because it performs no useful function (imagine a world in which everything with no function was removed). Can they really believe all these things or is it, as with probably many prescriptions for braces, just another way of fleecing a gullible public under the guise of respectable modern orthodontics? This all seems to boil down to one basic question: If God didn't intend us to have wisdom teeth why are they there?