Now I get it

I guess I’m a little slow when it comes to insight. You see, I had thought that John McCain was running a campaign for the Brafia nomination for the Presidency. I didn’t realize until just now that what they are really doing is a pilot for a 21st century version of the Keystone Cops (does anyone remember them). Now that I understand this I can more easily understand what McCain has been doing. Take, for example, his recent pronouncement that Social Security was (is) an “absolute disgrace” (why any U.S. politician would say this is a mystery to me, even if he believed it). It turns out that this absolute disgrace is paying him almost $2000 a month. He and his wife are filthy rich, with an estimated fortune of 100 million, but she, too, apparently draws her social security disgrace check (now this is disgraceful). Take also his claim that we have won a “marvelous victory” in Iraq, and having won such a victory we must, of course, remain there for a long time (that’s what winners do). He sticks to this view even though al-Maliki and Gordon Brown both subscribe to Obama’s desire to withdraw within 16 months, as does the vast majority of American voters. When al-Maliki announced he approved of this plan for withdrawal, the Bush Administration tried to argue it was an error in translation. That failed, leaving McCain almost alone in wanting to stay in Iraq (forever?). Even Bush has capitulated and decided now there has to be some kind of time line for withdrawal (although he won’t call it a time line, as such), leaving McCain even more isolated. Then there is his repeated insistence that we will not engage in any diplomacy with Iran, contrary to what Obama would like. Bush has now begun to engage in at least preliminary diplomatic relations with Iran, thus undercutting McCain’s insistence that such behavior would be unthinkable. McCain made fun of Obama for wanting to send more troops to Afghanistan. Now, however, he wants to one-up Obama by sending in even more troops to Afghanistan than Obama. Also, after goading Obama into visiting the Middle East, it turns out to have been a terrible mistake from McCain’s perspective. Obama is getting all the press and is obviously making his position as a candidate much stronger than it was. McCain’s campaign was literally drooling over the possibility that Obama would make some sort of gaffe they would be able to exploit. The only gaffe that has been made so far was by McCain himself when referring to the non-existant border between Iraq and Pakistan. This is in the same genre as his repeated reference to Czechoslovakia, a country that ceased to exist about fifteen years ago, and his repeated confusion over Sunni and Shiite. He now insists we have “succeeded” in Iraq and keeps repeating that he “knows how to win wars” (does anyone know what the hell he is talking about). I am not very expert at such things but this sounds delusional to me. McCain also keeps insisting that we need to drill offshore for oil even though most people are opposed to doing so (and even though he has previously voted against it). Even T-bone (aka T. Boone) Pickens, a lifelong oil man, has said we cannot drill our way out of this “crisis,” and seems to want to invest in wind and solar a la Al Gore. McCain wants us to believe that such drilling will reduce the price of gasoline at the pump which everyone knows it utter nonsense. Utter nonsense does not seem to affect McCain. His idea to reduce the Federal gas tax for the summer has also drawn nothing but ridicule. And of course McCain remains staunchly anti-abortion (the official position of the Brafia “base”) even though the majority of American women are pro-choice. This would not be quite so ridiculous were it not for McCain’s attempt to woo the so-called “Hillary vote,” which is decidedly pro-choice. He has also referred to his wife in public by an exceedingly derogatory term and has been known to tell a joke about how women enjoy being raped (according to the MSM this is merely an example of McCain’s “authenticity”). I’m sure this will help him immensely with the Hillary vote. Then there was McCain’s attempt to enlist what’s-his-face Magee on his behalf. When Magee’s true lunacy became apparent and even too much for the Brafia insiders, McCain threw him under the bus. Now, however, it looks like he might get the endorsement of another loony evangelical, James Dobson. Remember, these religious right wingers were soundly criticized by McCain earlier, who now is desperate for their endorsements. Don’t forget McCain’s claim that he was against lobbying while surrounding himself not only with lobbyists, but lobbyists for some of the worst people in the world. And he picked Phil Gramm to be his economic advisor. Phil Gramm, who was personally responsible for the Enron disaster and now for the mortgage meltdown. He, too has had to resign. McCain previously said he didn’t know much about economics, but later reversed himelf, just as he has reversed himself on just about everything else, while at the same time accusing Obama of being a flip-flopper. In short, his campaign has been nothing but one long comedy of errors, putting even the Keystone Cops to shame. Today it raised hilarity to an even new and unprecedented dimension when he released a video placing the blame for high gasoline prices on…tad da… Barack Obama! Even some of the MSM pundits were doubled over in hysterics. If you think this is funny, there are still people out there who claim to support this troupe of clowns. When a fighter is overmatched, over the hill, and taking on too much punishment, his handlers usually mercifully throw in the towel. I doubt that McCain will get much mercy from his “compassionate conservative” backers. They are, as we already know, a sadistic bunch.

LKBIQ:
The world is a tragedy to those who feel, but a comedy to those who think.
Horace Walpole