The Commander-in-Chief Test

The MSM has been spending a lot of time and energy over the question of who would be the best Commander-in-Chief, between Obama and McCain, that is. I do not recall this ever being an issue in previous elections. Why, I wonder, is it now? It probably has to do with the Brafia’s attempt to keep Barack Obama from becoming President, and thus Commander-in-Chief. This allows them to argue that as McCain has military experience and Obama does not, McCain would be a better Commander-in-Chief. There is no evidence whatsoever for this position. Furthermore, had this been considered a requirement in the past, John Kerry would be President and George W. Bush would probably still be in the brig. Similarly, Bill Clinton would never have been elected President. The (perhaps) unfortunate reality is that there are no known requirements for becoming POTUS, and hence no requirements for becoming Commander-in-Chief. Other, that is, than having to be at least 35 years of age and born in the United States. I don’t think there is even a requirement that you be completely sane. I suppose if you were blatantly and obviously completely bonkers you probably couldn’t make the grade (you can become pretty bonkers while in office, however). Anyway, as this question has now surfaced, perhaps we should devise some kind of test, the successful passing of which would allow you to run and possibly become President and Commander-in-Chief. Based upon my unscientific study of past Presidents I should think the following questions might suffice:

1. Are you reasonably fluent in the English language, yes or no?
2. Can you locate the Middle East on a map of the world?
3. Can you locate either Russia or China on a map of the world?
4. How about Iran, Iraq, and Israel?
5 Which one of the ten commandments is the constitution?
6 Is the Washington Monument a phallic symbol or just a cigar?
7 Did you graduate from High School?
8 With better than a “C” average?
9 Are you financially secure?
10 Round off your holdings to the nearest ten million ___________.
11 How many wives have you had?
12 Which one did you like the best?
13 Have you ever been completely sober and drug free for more than ten days at a time?
14 Does your current spouse bake cookies?
15 Can she use a machine gun?
16 Should morality play any role in government?
17 How about ethics?
18 If the U.S. spends more on national defense than all other nations combined, is that sufficient? 19 Are you now, or have you ever been a Muslim?
20 Is Christianity the official religion of the U.S.?
21 What church do you attend?
22 What is your favorite hymn?
23 Should atheists have the same rights as homosexuals?
24 Are homosexuals made or born?
25 Can homosexuality be cured?
26 How about with stem cells?
27 Was Abraham Lincoln a slave?
28 Was George Washington a cherry tree?
29 What happens to people when they die?
30 Is George W. Bush alive or dead?

Now you may think these questions are not sufficient to answer the basic question of who would make the best Commander-in-Chief. But in psychological testing you have to understand that it is not necessarily the actual content of the questions that matter, but, rather, whether or not the answers correlate with being a successful Commander-in-Chief. It might be a bit difficult but no doubt our historians could go back to the records of past Commanders-in-Chief, find out how they would have answered these questions, and then correlate their answers with their success as Commanders-in-Chief. Simple, no? Of course you would have to have a measure of their success as Commander-in-Chief. I can’t pursue this here but it would be relatively simple: how many wars have you won? How many people did you kill? How many troops did you waste? How much money did the industrial/military/political system make (estimate only, of course), how long were you able to keep it going? Measures like that. You may think this is absurd. I assure you it is no more absurd than the MSM trying to tell us this is an important issue that can actually be decided by endless and meaningless discussions of it on TV.

LKBIQ:
In politics, an absurdity is not a handicap.
Napoleon Bonaparte