The Trouble with Spencer

Sandal-clad nuns chase
down armed burglar,
hold him for police.

The problem with Spencer is that he is a cat, an all-white, blue-eyed cat, skinny, with long legs and a piteous voice. Supposedly he belongs to one of our neighbors. He has, at least, been fixed. But he seems to have decided he likes us better. One morning he showed up at our door, a glass door that opens on the upper deck of our house. He just sat there looking in, watching our other four cats eating their usual breakfasts. I interpreted his expression as one of longing and, more importantly, hunger. What to do? With four cats we certainly do not need another. I suppose we could have just ignored him, but that was not in us. Neither my wife, my son, or I even considered merely ignoring the skinny creature sitting there watching our every move. Nor did anyone suggest we take him to the local pound (where, my son insisted, he would be “put away”). My wife insisted we feed him even though even she acknowledged we really did not want him around. We put a bowl of food on the deck and locked him outside. He ravenously devoured the food, took a drink from a bucket of clean water we keep there for that purpose, and left. We hoped that would be the end of it, he would return home where he rightfully belonged.

Of course, early the next morning he was lying there in front of the door. Yes, I know, we should have known better. And of course my wife fed him again. We still inisisted he not be allowed in the house. This routine lasted for a few days until the weather heated up enough to leave the screen door ajar so the cats can go in and out without our having to jump up every few minutes to let one in or out. We have a cat door in the basement but our cats are apparently too lazy to use it if they do not have to do so (and they know suckers when they see them). So…it was inevitable that Spencer would eventually come in where all the cat food is lined up enticingly for the four gourmet cats my wife insists we need (why this need has never been explained to me), and who seem to have different tastes from one another (they are very particular about what they will eat). Now Spencer comes in whenever he chooses and, always starving it appears, he systematically eats a bit from every available source. To his credit, after eating most everything in sight, he leaves. We have no idea where he spends most of his time.

When my wife confronted his reputed owner, as to why they apparently didn’t feed or take care of him, she was told their other cats (they have several) don’t like him. They also said they didn’t care if he came to our house or if we fed him. In fact, they suggested we might want to adopt him (this seemed to already be a de facto arrangement already). There are many people here who would happily shoot cats on sight, or who would at least turn them in to the pound, but we could never do such a thing. Perhaps the most interesting thing about this is Spencer’s relationships with our other four cats. You might think they would object, even strenuously, to the presence of a strange cat that shows up uninvited and consumes their food. Strangely (at least it seems strange to me) they don’t. Our male cat, Midnight, also fixed, although perhaps dominant, just pals around with Spencer, although he obviously doesn’t like him in the house. The three females (also all fixed) mostly just ignore Spencer. They watch while he invades their space but do not interfere with his eating. I attribute this to some feature of cat behavior in which they seem to know that it is necessary to allow all other cats to eat for the good of the species, even if they don’t like them. I have never seen any of our cats squabble or fight over food (perhaps they would if food became scarce?). So far Spencer is treated much like a leper. He is tolerated but as yet has never attempted to stay in the house beyond his meals. I have no idea what would happen if, like them, he decided to sleep on the couch or in one of the chairs, or wherever. He seems to know “his place,” eats, and then departs for his life in the forest (I guess). Sometimes he lies by the side of the driveway where he can disappear into the vegetation when necessary. He is friendly now with us, but shy. He will rub up against our legs but does not seem to enjoy being petted, and definitely does not like to be picked up. We seem to have come to an understanding with this loner that works okay. Spencer never complains. But, as my wife asked, what will we do when it turns cold and begins to snow? Unfortunately, I know what we will do. I like Spencer, and I feel sorry for him, but I don’t want him sleeping on my bed. Are we crazy? You might well think so.

LKBIQ:
"I meant," said Ipslore bitterly, "what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?"Death thought about it."Cats," he said eventually. "Cats are nice."
Terry Pratchett

TILT:
An estimated one million wild camels now live in the Australian outback.